And now for something completely different...

This is a lovely video by the Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theater. We were shown this during program orientation, and as silly as it is, it is still informative.

Who says textbooks can't be mildly amusing?

The section we just read in my womens' studies book is entitled "Women, Power, and Politics." One of the issues it discussed was women involvement in the military. In a sidebar about a study done in 2000 on opinions among military men about women serving in the military, I found this tidbit:
"Although a relationship between leadership potential and upper body strength has yet to be discovered, men expressed resentment toward women who were securing leadership roles in the military withough necessarily 'proving' (i.e., women are not required to do as many push-ups as men) that they belonged there."
Interesting. Dry humor aside, this does raise an interesting question: why, exactly, do people object to women serving in the military?

gotta love the wisdom of college students...

Is there really anything left to say?

Most Epic Trilingual Scrabble Game Ever

A few more excellent quotations

Am I not using this door right?

-Loni 

It's a complicated equation involving the location of my dad's desk, the TV, and the prevailing couches...

-Eric (on which room in his house is the family room)

Yes I am THAT short

any mail in box?

unfortunately, no clue

time to jump and see

It was a little Ridiculous

The epic bra search
Spanned two days and was, at last
Successful. Very good

Hooray for Brassieres
That fit! But I can't spend that
Much money again.

Completely random and Very Funny Quotations

From a random girl I walked past in front of the MU-

"...and then I told him...there is like no way those could be my pajamas...I don't even own any pajamas!"

"...and then we get to the Count (a character in the Marriage of Figaro) who, lets face it, is basically a complete asshole." -Dr. Jacquie Scott (my badass human event teacher who wears gorgeous clothing, great heels, and is a totally awesome feminist...)

In my Bones, Stones, Human Evolution textbook-

"The chances of a structure like the human eye arising completely by chance are like a hurricane blowing through a junkyard and by chance assembling a Boeing 747"

"God Bless Women...its the little things you learn, like you will never again wear jeweled underwear to pilates, because that cute little jewel is now forever imprinted into your back." 

-Pilates teacher

"Basically...people have sex. And then along comes a baby."

-Dr. Thomas Puleo (who, incidently is the best dressed male professor I have ever met)

I walked past...then I backed up and walked past again...

...hmm

Neologism contest

I suspect you're all the sort to like this sort of thing... :P

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. Enjoy!

 The winners are:
 1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
 2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
 3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
 4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
 5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
 6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
 7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
 8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
 9. Flatulence (n .) emergency vehicle that  picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
 10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:
1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright idea s from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of having sex.
3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
 4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
 5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
 6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
 7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
 8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease.
 9. Karmageddon (n): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
14. Beelzebug (n.) : Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.
 And the pick of the literature:
16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Is anyone else amused by this?

Say what??

In honor of the holidays, I'm going to post something completely unrelated to any winter celebration whatsoever...just something that I deal with every day that it occured to me might be sort of funny to read--the literal transliteration between English and Norwegian. Since the two languages share a great deal still and more or less came from the same languages, most things can be translated literally and directly between the two and still make sense, as long as you go back and rearrange the grammar. Usage, however, is a different story. Here's some very commonly used phrases in Norwegian, their literal translation, and the most common English phrase to say the same thing:

Hva skjer a? - What cuts? - How's it going/what's happening?

Hvis du vil - If you will- If you'd like to (in certain situations this sounds quite strange)

Hvis du har lyst til - if you have lust to - If you want (it was literally months before I could bring myself to say this)

Fy faen oss - oh damn us - general obscenity exclamation, (not especially mild but very common nonetheless) but when Norwegians are speaking english, they often translate it as 'fuck us', which i invariably find hilarious

messing naken - brass naked - norwegians translate this one as 'really naked' or 'very naked'...just an expression but rather entertaining to hear them try to explain to the american the difference between 'naked' and 'really naked'

i det pratsomme hjørnet - in the talkative corner (prate = chat) - in a talkative mood

anyway, you get the point.